Blatherings from de haart

Ack! Bumped into this one again. Felt it all over again. My mother of a paragraph written ages ago...

This is the heights! Can’t go out for a freaking walk! I mean what’s the harm in that except that it’s 7:00 in the evening (am rolling my eyes). Could’ve been done with fresh air and a break by now if it hadn’t been for that monumental argument over why I shouldn’t go out for a walk (still no reason by the way). The outcome is that I figured that I am in fact fucking mad! Actually hypertension. Who wouldn’t!?! I mean, would you agree to stay within four walls for more than freaking 24 hrs!!! I think this episode would establish my future- writer of brilliant books cause I’ve finally got trauma to back me up! But come to think of it, this isn’t really a problem…not the worst. Nothing earth shattering really. Just four walls that cling to me. But that’s definitely good enough to start me off on “A room for whom???” I would go onto figure out original symbols which mock Angelou’s repeated use of the “caged bird” image. I did probably talk of a stripper in a cage who has freedom to flaunt her body and tease herself but can’t ever cum. There would be strains of Gilman’s yellow wallpaper though. And that bastard Rousseau’s “return to the noble savage”. What frivolity man! I’m born into the world after a freaking nine-month pregnancy of puking, fattening, and labor pains that could kill a man. To do what??? To conform to time, dress code, to eat at the table during breakfast, lunch and dinner; to study hard at something which bores you, or something you couldn’t react to within a span off few hours cause it’s so mind blowing. But who cares? You’re dumb if you can’t cope. You never learnt anything from anything if you don’t have numerals above the pass mark. And why do I study geography in school? Just to put me in my place of course. To show that all those lands are inaccessible to me, that I’m stuck in this southern port city. And to probably justify the existence of the educational system by saying “look if you don’t study hard you won’t have money to see the world”. What clever manipulation! And if I don’t have an aptitude for science, I’m hopeless. I’m a misfit; I shouldn’t have been born if I can’t marvel at it. But I do marvel at it. I marvel at the phone, the fridge, the mixy, and so many other things. I’m happy marveling at them and know how to work them. That’s all. And ultimately what is all this science put to use for? Marriage and progeny. To promote it and propagate it. “Look, get married and give birth to children. Only then can we think of stuff to keep you all pleased.” Minds work, and the economy depend on progeny. A clog in the wheel? Naah…you’re the all important axis. Being a female it makes you even more important- oh mother! No wonder they’re against gays and lesbians. The economy would crash. The mind would rot. The world wouldn’t exist. There wouldn’t be any concept of economics, people to propagate religion to (even God wouldn’t exist? Wow!), no buildings to build, no need for historians and theoreticians to come up with some crap to fill in textbooks. We would all be jobless. So I’m supposed to keep them entertained??? That’s my life’s goal? To enjoy sex and then grunt a few months later? And does it stop with that? No. I give birth to the kid and tell him/her his/her duty. And what is that? Sex. Don’t use condoms. Keep population control in mind though. (Cant even enjoy sex enough) oh but don’t jump. You have to legalize it you see. Get married. Then only they can put you down in the records and calculate the future citizens, growth of economy and mind work. Laying of new roads, malls, air traffic, why even the security of a nation depends upon you. Progeny man…that’s the key to your existence. Nothing would exist without it. Think about it. Food for thought? Ohhhh I’m going green! I hate statistics!

Bloody hell! Mighty pissed with the HR in office. The loos been out of service for nearly 2 weeks. And yep I'm pmsin and which means I need the friggin loo too work. Like p'dner says I could sue them for discrimination or worse comes to worse roll them pads in wads of paper and leave them in a corner just so that they pay attention. aaargghh! If it's not fixed by tomorrow I'm considering telling the HR guy that my periods are due. Not that I have any queasiness telling just that I have issues with the scandalized look that I'll be faced with...ugh! Bledy loo...mens loo is a perpetually wet one. I want the nice sunshiny, tin doored, sky blue, dry ladies loo on the terrace!